Lessons from top leaders
HBSDealer’s recent Top Women in Hardware & Building Supply event featured an informative, empowering session titled “Negotiation Skills & Being Your Own Best Advocate.” The discussion was led by Lisa Saunders, divisional merchandise manager for Do it Best, and Melissa Handy, who serves as SVP and general merchandising manager, Hardlines, for Lowe’s.
The duo discussed a range of topics and offered practical guidance aimed to help empower women, in particular, on the job. Below is a collection of tips and takeaways provided by Saunders and Handy.
When to pause—and when to push
When entering a negotiation, or really any kind of meeting with colleagues, preparation is essential. Saunders says to consider: Who’s going to be at the table? What role will each person play in the meeting, and what issues are they most concerned with?
Above all, Saunders says to clarify your goals before walking into the room, and make sure each person understands your objectives in plain, unvarnished terms. Also, consider potential counter points or objections to your proposal that may arise to prevent being thrown off guard in the heat of the moment.
If you do lose your cool or start feeling like you might, it’s OK to take a beat or a break. “Know when to pause, and when to push,” Saunders suggests.
Honing “soft skills” like active listening can help swing a negotiation your way. Make sure to show engagement by asking questions and making eye contact. Emotional intelligence and empathy are now a “must have” in business, Saunders says, and that fact applies to negotiations as well.
Saunders also shared the following tips to bolstering your negotiation skills:
- You’re not there to stick it to someone or crush your “opponent.” A win-win for both parties is ideal.
- Manage your emotions. If you feel emotions start to rise, take a break to reset. If you need a minute to compose yourself, take your time.
- Before entering a meeting, consider what your best alternative options are if your No. 1 preference, plan or proposal doesn’t work.
- When negotiating, always emphasize mutual benefits rather than just talking about yourself, your team or your company.
- Be ready to close. If things do go your way, are you prepared to seal the deal and take the steps necessary to make it official?
- Always take notes, whether by hand or with an app, so you can recap the proceedings and ensure everyone’s on the same page. Always follow up with an email that recaps what was decided or determined.
- Always thank people for their time.
Melissa Handy on being your own advocate
At work, especially, “we all need advocates for us,” says Handy. In order to rise and to increase your workplace impact, it’s essential to build a network of people who can and will vouch for you, she says. This is one case in which it pays to be proactive, as touting others’ talents and singing each other’s praise can be contagious. Advocating for others can spark a virtuous cycle of edifying, uplifting behavior, as opposed to toxic work environments where people actively tear each other down.
Handy offers more guidance on advocating for yourself (and others) at work:
- Establish a group of personal advocate champions, and nurture other people who will vouch for you at the time of need.
- It’s not your job to be the loudest voice; use your voice to edify others.
- It’s important for people to know where you want to go. Be clear about your objectives, goals and intentions.
- Put yourself out there, and let people know why you’re qualified.
- If you won’t pat yourself on the back, who will?
- Instead of saying “why me?” say, “Why NOT me?”
- Solicit honest feedback from peers, colleagues and supervisors, and actually do something about the suggestions.
- Advocating for others can inspire others to model that behavior and do the same.
- You have to put yourself out there. It’s OK to proactively sell yourself and toot your own horn to let people know why you’re qualified and worthy.
